The Olive Garden Question (And How to Solve It)

How to Be Happy All the Time Without Faking It, Even if You’re a Grumpy-Pants

3-5 minute read. Audio included for those who prefer to listen.

If You’ve Ever Been to Olive Garden…

The name alone probably triggers an automatic response. We whisper, “ooooh, breadsticks” like the aliens from Toy Story and start drooling on our shirts. Why? Because their breadsticks are gas. And because we are hardwired for self-interest. (Hey, why are you clicking away?)

It’s true! At our core, we want what we want.

Breadsticks + my belly = me happy.

And to our flesh, “me happy” is all that matters.

The Olive Garden Question

In our self-centered minds Olive Garden was created for us. But to it’s founders, it was their path to fatter wallets.

“So which is it?” You say through tears, realizing you’re not the sole reason they wake up at 3am to make ravioli. “Who was Olive Garden really made for?”

This is the Olive Garden Question. And it has everything to do with your soul-satisfaction today.

The Olive Garden Lie

I once heard it said, “The kingdom of God is built on relationships.” And the more I think on it, the more I agree. Jesus lived it. And if Jesus’ relationships were marked by anything, it was service. 

There’s a nice passage in Matthew 20 that shows us God’s take on service. Basically two of the disciples and their mom get in hot water because Momma asks Jesus to give her boys special status. She wants them to sit on either side of him in the kingdom of God. She wants them to be seen as, like DJ Khaled says, “the greatest that ever did it.” Buuuuuut…

“…when the ten heard it, they were indignant at the two brothers.”

Understandable. It’s a bad look. But Jesus didn’t let them squabble for long. He called them to himself to explain true greatness:

“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles Lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

The Olive Garden Answer

According to Jesus, greatness isn’t:

• Olive Garden’s corporate staff making bank.

• Olive Garden’s customers making their money back by never saying “when” to the parm grinder as they carb-load on free breadsticks.

• Getting a special seating arrangement in heaven.

In simple terms, greatness isn’t about us.

Its about serving others.

The Happy-All-The-Time Solution

Service just works.

• It works in business - think Chick-fil-a.

• It works in relationships - think about any flourishing marriage (let’s do the dishes, dudes).

• It works in church, the world, the classroom.

Service works in everything. And this is not some pie in the sky spiritual concept. Service is scientifically life-giving. God made it so acts of kindness actually spark oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine production in our brains (the feel-good, connect-with-other-people, mood-regulating chemicals we experience when we’re generous).

Everybody wins when we serve. Because it’s the way God made a perfect world to work. (No, we won’t be happy all the time, but you get the idea).

The Real Question

The original question was,

“Who was Olive Garden really made for?”

But if life isn’t all about us, then let’s alter the question:

“Who were we really made for?”

Eat them breadsticks while you figure it out ;)

Peace

- Toby ❤️

P.S., read below for a 60 second read about practical, fun ways to serve.

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Practical Application

Below is an epic method for service I learned at my time in TeenPact Leadership Schools.

Here are the steps:

1. Look around the room.

2. Identify a need.

3. Meet the need.

That’s it!

Key point: DO NOT ASK WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE. That’s the easy way out. It robs you of whim and creativity, and it robs the recipient of the wow factor.

3 quick examples for you to try:

• You’re at your friend Stacy’s house. You know she likes things tidy but there have been some guests recently and the place feels disorganized, so you clear the surfaces, straighten the books on the coffee table, and light a candle to settle the space. Instant sigh for Stacy.

• You’re at work and you overhear Brian from HR say he’s had a long week and feels drained. You remember last week he also said he really likes gummy worms. So during your lunch break you drop $2.50 on some Trolli’s and bring them to him with a sticky note saying, “You rock! Grateful you work here dude!” Nice!

• Your neighbor Patty is both a widow and bad with technology. So you proactively visit her once a week to see if she has any issues with her TV or wifi or if she needs help finding that corn bread recipe she by mistake deleted.

When we start seeing people’s problems as opportunities to bless, I’m convinced life becomes a game.

“And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

1 Cor 13:13

Have the best week ever!

- Toby ❤️

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